Working a Saturday

I work selling furniture. Some days I really like it, some days I really, really don’t. I’ve been doing this for 7 years. Ugh. I have worked every weekend since I started the job, unless I have requested off. When I got pregnant, I had every intention of continuing that schedule. Although it sounded horrible, the baby wasn’t going to be in any sports or events that I would really need off for. This would give daddy and baby bonding time. As the end of my maternity leave got closer and closer, I realized I could not be away from my girl all weekend. I needed a family day. Justin and I work different schedules, so we never have a day off together. I decided I wasn’t working Sunday’s anymore. Luckily, my job agreed. I work 100% commission, so it really wasn’t hurting anyone but me to take more time off. While I do love hearing the stories about Daddy Daughter Saturday’s, I wish I was there. I miss her so much on that day, maybe even more than the other days I work. Although, I miss her like crazy every day I’m not with her. My long term goal is to be a stay at home mom. I never in a million years thought I would want that! I always thought I would be the career woman striving for an amazing future at a extremely productive company. I want all of that still, but I want to be the best mom to Savanna even more. She means more to me than all the money in the world. I hope my days of working Saturday’s are getting closer to being over. I’m enjoying watching this little girl grow and I don’t want to miss a thing!

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This is for Savvy

One day, in the way, way far off future, I want Savanna to be able to read all of what I write. I want her to know how much she is loved and all of the fun things she did. I want her to know the joy she brought to our lives and the happiness we have raising her. If for some crazy reason I am not here to tell her all of that, I want her to be able to know. I want her to know my past and her daddy’s past. I want her to learn from what we have done and grow into the most amazing person I know she can be. So, to my little Savanna now, and my Savanna in the future, I love you more than words can say and nothing will ever, ever change that.

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The future starts now

What do you do when you are at a crossroad in life? You could just give up and do what others expect, you could stay on the path you are on, or you can go in the direction you always imagined yourself and follow your dreams. My husband asked me tonight what my plans were. Meaning, what the hell am I doing with my life. What do I want to do with my life. Do I even know? Have I thought that far ahead? We have a 9 month old, my spare time does not necessarily include thinking of what my aspirations for the future are. I dream of her future and what I want for her. But, not really until now did I realize my future will shape hers. I can stay on this road I am on, which on one hand is quite comfortable but it gives me nothing to strive for no goals to attain. Today, I will take the path I always dreamed. I will do something I love. I have a job – don’t love it. I have a degree – don’t love it. But, I have a family and I’m over the moon in love with them. I will do what is best for my family, I will make myself happy and we all win. Now, my journey begins.

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